How To Gain A New Perspective On Men in Midlife Crisis Through The Lens Of An Electrical Engineer
| This is a guest post by Johnathan J Tack who is an electrical engineer and sees himself as a Midlifer making his way to the end-zone of life. You will understand more the phrase “end-zone of life” as you read this blog. Johnathan can be reached at tackjj@yahoo.com. |
As of November 2013, I will have turn 45 so I am definitely a Midlifer and as I am discovering, in need of answers for life, love, faith and work. What I’ve been told and am expected to believe and do does not completely match up with my life experiences.
This is my perspective on men in midlife crisis; this is how I see it:
We go to school, get our education, land an office job and start our climb up the corporate ladder. After 20 years of climbing the same ladder we hit a plateau. At this plateau we can look down (back) on those 20+ years and with 20/20 vision see all of the good, the bad and the indifferent things on that leg of our journey. And it is in this time of reflecting that we question ourselves. What difference have I made, who have I helped, is this where I truly want to be and so many more self-doubting questions.
During the reflection phase I look around and see that I’m standing on a football field near mid-field (representing midlife). At one end is the goal for the corporate team. They have several strings of players and coaches to guide you and back you up during play time. The trouble is that you don’t get to decide your salary, your uniform, and when the team crosses the end zone it’s the team owners that get the credit. The play is easier but you trade your personal success for that fixed support.
Towards the other goal is a team of giants opposing your every move. They are self-doubt, worry, loss of athleticism, weight gain, failure, financial instability and their quarterback is Fear. They’re big, they’re intimidating and they certainly cast long foreboding shadows over the field. Our victory comes in knowing that when we cross the end zone it’s our victory due to our efforts in beating Team Fear but before we can cross any goal line we must decide “which way”.
One of the things I have learned on my journey is that if you are going to raise a concern or complaint then you must also offer a solution. When I think of “men in midlife crisis” what enters my mind is the stigmatism/stereotype of a gray haired (or balding), overweight man who just divorced his wife and bought a brand new convertible. This is wrong and I know it but that’s what pops into my head when I see or hear the term, “men in midlife crisis”. With all the challenges I am facing I believe I can stand taller and stronger knowing that I will “Be a Manpreneur”.
As a professional in midlife – whether you are a male or female – you may see this stage of life a bit different from Johnathan. It would be great to get your feedback on his thoughts. He would love to hear from you and so do others. Would you take a few minutes and leave a comment in the box below so that we can continue this dialog?
November 10, 2013
Blogpost, Positive Mindset